Caregivers of Parents: The Forgotten Workforce

Is it just me? Or do caregivers of parents get the short end of the stick, especially at work? 

Please don’t get it twisted–I’m not coming for parents of kids so let’s not go there. But let’s talk about the other kind of caregiver—the one no one throws a baby shower for. Meet the Kident—the grown-up ‘kid’ who becomes the caregiver (or ‘parent’) to their parent. (Yes, I made that term up. And yes, it needs to exist.)

It’s normal to give grace to a woman who has just given birth. Who is struggling to navigate being a pro at work while being a new mom at home. We ask to see pictures, we cheer her on. We’ll even spend precious meeting time dissecting the highs and lows of parenting.

But why don’t we show up the same way for colleagues navigating the heavy lift of caring for an aging or dying parent? 

Is it not just as adorable to hear about how last night’s diaper change with Mom went sideways? Or how bath time has become the most anxiety-inducing part of someone’s day? (No? Just me?) 

Kids Get Cheers, Parents Get Crickets

Caregivers of parents aren’t just emotionally drained—they’re also financially squeezed, career-stalled, and invisible. 

Sociologists even have a name for this overlooked group: the Sandwich Generation—adults who are raising kids while also caring for aging parents. Studies show that caregiving stress leads to higher rates of anxiety, depression, and financial strain, yet society offers more structured support for parents of young children than for adult children caring for their elders. 

Our culture celebrates honoring parents when we’re kids (obeying them, making them proud), but honoring them when they’re old and dependent? That’s when the world gets real quiet. 

Funny, considering the Fifth Commandment doesn’t come with an age limit:

‘Honor your father and mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you’ (Exodus 20:12).

The world cheers when kids light up their parents’ faces with achievements, but when those same kids grow up and start making sacrifices for their aging parents? Suddenly, it’s not as cute. 

We rally behind parents stressing over saving for college, but when someone is drowning in their parent’s estate paperwork, where’s the same love? 

We wouldn’t dare tolerate a daycare leaving a child unattended, but we turn a blind eye to nursing home neglect. We champion dads taking paternity leave, but lack the same consideration for the son who just became the full-time caregiver for his ailing father.

Our society protects children fiercely—and rightfully so. I’m just saying what if we held ourselves just as accountable for the way we treat our aging loved ones?

So why does this bother me? 

Because I’ve lived it. And honestly? I’m jealous. 

I know firsthand how different the experience is. I wish that when I became a kident, I had the same level of support, resources, or even just basic understanding that my fellow parents of kids received.

Imagine losing sleep—not because of a baby who won’t settle—but because you’re drowning in financial strain you never saw coming. No preparation. No budget. No nine-month heads-up to get your affairs in order. Just, one day, you’re at the park together, having a grand old time. Two days later, after an ER visit, a doctor says, ‘She needs 24-hour care now. So… figure it out.’

How do you go from living your best life to becoming a living sacrifice overnight? Where’s the ‘Kident 101’ handbook when you need it?

You know, the one that spills the tea on…

• Learning how to bathe an adult twice your size?
• Deciding what to do with the house, the car?
• Figuring out what to do when mom falls at 2 AM and you’re not strong enough to pick her up?

Employers, I have an idea. Hear me out.

What if we protected our elders the way we protect kids? What if companies actually supported employees in this role?

Like breastfeeding rooms, but make it nap rooms—because let’s be real, kidents are just as sleep-deprived. Employee Assistance Programs (EAPs), but with social service contacts who actually know a thing or two about elder care. Health benefits that allow listing parents as dependents—because family responsibilities don’t have an age limit. Or like a gym stipend, but instead, a stipend to help hire caregiving support.

And hear me out on this: Caregivers’ Relief Day—a corporate event where instead of just bringing your parent to work, the company hires professional caregivers for the day. Picture this: your parent gets to enjoy games, crafts, and—because we all deserve a little wonder—a magician (seriously, who doesn’t love magic??). They go for a walk around the campus, have a chef-prepared meal tailored to their dietary needs, and you get to check in on them throughout the day.

And you know what the best part is? Everyone wins. Employers could partner with a local agency, health clinic, or social services group to host this event—maybe not every other day (wishful thinking), but at least once a year. If the agency does a great job, they get invited back. Employees get firsthand exposure to vetted caregivers they might eventually hire for ongoing support. The company gets a focused, present workforce instead of employees stretched thin by caregiving stress. Your elderly loved one gets to make new friends, enjoy fresh experiences, and be well cared for and pampered too. And you? You get a “day off” from the double shift.

Tell me that wouldn’t be a game-changer.

Caregiving: A Role We All Eventually Play

Look, at the end of the day, most of us will play both roles—being cared for and becoming a caregiver. Maybe you’re a new parent navigating sleepless nights. Or a kident who just got life figured out, only to be thrown into parenting your own parent. Maybe you’re an empty nester suddenly back in the caregiving cycle sooner than expected. No matter where you fall, one thing is clear: caregiving isn’t just for parents of kids.

So next time a colleague mentions their parent’s health struggles, show up for them the way you would for a new mom or dad. Because one day, you might relate all too closely—and that caregiver could very well be you.

A note from Erin: Thank you for being here! If these ideas or perspectives resonate with you, I’d love for you to subscribe or share them with someone you care about. If you want to make a change or when the time feels right, I’m here to help. Check out my new “WORK WITH ME” page to explore how we can collaborate—or swing by my “CONTACT” page to say hello, ask a question, or start a conversation.